Saturday, February 27, 2010

As Eric Cartman of Colorado would say...

JESUS CHRIST MONKEY BALLS!!!


Breaking news. As in, breaking my soul, shattering it into millions of tiny pieces. Could this really be true?

It says this guy is rumored, LISTED ON IMDB AS RUMORED, to be Peter Parker. I pray with all my heart for this to not be true. Who am I talking about of course? I'm talking about an asshole named David Henrie.



Okay, so maybe he's not an asshole. No. Whoever posted this rumor is. This guy, if you don't know him, is mainly in a show called The Wizards of Waverly Place...on Disney Channel.

How could a "grittier" version of Spider-Man be carried out by someone who's main job is a Disney Channel comedy, or as Silver, my sister, calls them, shitcom? Really? Are you FUCKING SERIOUS? Is this some kind of sick joke? Why don't you just desecrate any possible hope for redemption from the world of cinema? Why don't you rape my childhood memories even more times? How will I ever be able to believe in God or anything for that matter? This is nearly as bad as the Chace Crawford/Captain America rumor... on second thought, it's that bad.

I'm sorry David Henrie. You seem like a nice guy. So, if you really are a nice guy then I have one request for you.

STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM SPIDER-MAN! Thank you.

Now I realize this may sound kind of harsh, but considering this guy is not ready for something that big, and the need for perfect casting is just too delicate, I have my reasons for saying stuff like this. Especially since Spider-Man was one of my first real movies. So yeah. Those are my thoughts. Don't like them? Well, then, as Eric Cartman would say, suck my balls (if I had any). Since I don't have any, you can suck Eric's balls. So there. I may be a teenager, but my taste in movies is definitely not that low.

More on that Lovely Little Spider...

...Man.

Someone made this amazing, high quality, fanmade poster of the Spider-Man Reboot. And after this, I WANT THESE PEOPLE CAST!!!! If Marc Webb follows this poster, I will be happy. I love both of those actors; they're both talented and around the right age. Well, here's the link to the poster:

Fan-Made Poster Link

Friday, February 26, 2010

Casting a Soldier

Okay, not just a soldier, but this soldier:



Yep. Captain America.

The director Joe Johnston (director of Jumanji, October Sky, Jurassic Park 3, Hidalgo, and most recently, The Wolfman) reportedly has to cast Captain America soon...by March 1, 2010 (aka this Monday), according to this article:

"Several Contenders Vie for Captain America Role"

Out of those contenders, I got most excited with

GARRETT HEDLUND!!! OMFG!!!!

Sorry. I'm just kind of a fan of him.

Also, I wouldn't mind Mike Vogel and that one guy from Priveleged (he was in Smallville).

John Krasinski - that idea has potential. It's like one of those WTF-but-that-would-be-interesting casting possibilities. If he was casted, it could be his time to show his true talent, because I know it's in there somewhere. If not Captain America, he could be Antman.

But, also according to the article, there is a possibility none of these people could be casted (just get Chace Crawford away from this movie - it's not your time and it sure as hell ain't your movie!). Well, we'll just have to wait and see.

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Heroes: An Epiphany

I realized something as I was watching Heroes Season 4 episodes online. I may have said I loved Twilight, but I LURVE Heroes. It is beyond my favorite show. So, here is a little simple equation:

Heroes > Twilight

:D

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If I haven't said enough, I ain't sayin' any more.